How Finding the Good in Others Can Help You
‘Looking for the good in others’ is probably something you were taught to do in your early education.
Elementary school teachers are pros at helping children to learn to keep an open mind about others and experiences.
Now, as an adult, you like the idea of it, but may have trouble applying this principle in your everyday life.
Turns out that looking for the good in people and experiences is an excellent way to turn your thoughts from the negative, into the positive, more harmonious thoughts. Remember, apply this idea to both people AND experiences.
Consider that even people that you may think of as wicked, lazy or insignificant have some good qualities and have done some good deeds.
Also, consider that even experiences that you consider time-wasters or places you would rather not be, can have some underlying good qualities.
It is generally accepted that there was never a person who did not have some good qualities or who did not do some good deeds. There was never an experience that did not have something good in it, or closely connected to it.
The search for the good, if diligent and faithful need never be in vain! When you find the good, remember to treasure that you got there. When your habit of looking for the good in others is fully established, negative thoughts will seldom intrude!
Let’s illustrate the theory of finding the good in experiences with an example.
A young woman, living on a busy Manhattan street, complained that she could not sleep because the noises of the busy city street outside her house disturbed her.
A colleague of hers suggested that every noise, whatever its character, had a musical note and she should try to find that note in each of the various sounds which she heard.
She decided to give it try. She abandoned all attempts to go to sleep and pursued in finding the musical note within the city street noises. Not surprisingly, she slept soundly all night.
Why was she able to find the sound sleep that had eluded her for so long?
The explanation is that before she had focused on the discordant characteristics of the noises that she heard, and by thinking these thoughts, she enlarged her consciousness of the negative, and kept herself awake.
In her search for the musical notes, she lost sight of the disturbing negative conditions, and she fell asleep because the discord of the noises no longer disturbed her. She let her mind focus and she got her desired result.
The search for the good in others and experiences, is one of the best methods for substituting negative thinking with positive, congruent thinking. A word of advice, do not limit your attempt to search for the good only ‘in the moment’. What I mean is, when you are having a negative experience or with a negative person, don’t go “oh yeah, I have to look for the good in people and experiences.”
Instead, consider looking for the good a ‘life work’, constantly in exercise to eliminate negative thoughts.
When you are able to change your thinking so that you always ‘look for the good’, you will discover that your life will shine brighter and brighter.
Not only for you – but also for others around you…family, associates, co-workers, employees and friends. The plain fact is, people gravitate towards and want to spend time with others that look for the good in people and experiences.
Perhaps you have someone in your life right now that exudes the positive thinking lifestyle. Likely, others comment on how positive they are; that no matter what, they always see the bright side. They may comment on their positive outlook and that they are pleasant to be around and that nary a negative word comes out of their mouth.
Isn’t it time that the people in your life started making statements like that when describing you?
If you pause and ponder about the good in that person or experience, I promise that you will stop that negative thought dead in its track.